Like in any relationship, before there was love there had to be attraction. So what was it that brought them together? In Stefan's case, it was Elena's resemblence to Katherine that grabbed his attention. She pulled the memories of his love and guilt to the surface leaving him transfixed by memories of what he had and what this new girl might be. He was also called by the beacon of her strength. It says in The Awakening that he had felt her bold personality teasing at the edges of his mind even before he first saw her. Her presense constantly bombarded him and she filled his life. And though he resisted her advances out of fear and guilt, their combined desires eventually overpowered him.

In the beginning, it seems that Elena was attracted to Stefan for superficial reasons. He was the very handsome, mysterious newcomerto town who arrived right when she was feeling very fed up and lost in her life. She had conquered just about every boy in school and still hadn't found what she was looking for, so her hope for satisfaction laid in him. After he rejected her, as no other boy had done before, her fascination grew as he was the prize just beyond her reach. She had to have him, both for pride's sake and to see if he was indeed just what she needed.

getting together

As much as he tried to stay away from Elena, Stefan was very concerned for her safety and failed to resist twice to come to her aid: once in the cemetery when the Other Power scared the girls away from her parents' grave and he feared that she'd run into the river and then to save her from Tyler on the night of the Homecoming dance. It was this need to protect that made him bring Elena home to clean her up and drive her home after he found her in Tyler's violent embrace. Elena finally was granted her opportunity to have him alone, and she confronted him about the way he had been treating her. To quiet her protests that he hated her, he told her the truth: that she looked like his former love and that the resemblence brought him pain. In sympathy she went to him, her close proximity draining Stefan of his will to resist and he kissed her. Spark flew and fires were lit. In each other they found both passion and peace.

loving each other

If we follow LJ's usual train of thought, you could call Elena and Stefan soulmates. However, as a stickler for practicality, I can't leave the reasons for their compatibility at that. This coupling worked because they filled the voids in their lives and helped each other pick up the pieces. Elena's acceptance of Stefan's nature soothed him, blasting away the idea that he would always be alone because of what he was. She was patient and supportive as he worked away the demons that were created when Katherine "died" which allowed him to put the past behind him so he could love again. She was strong when he needed a steady hand; understanding when he needed to be heard. Her love healed the wounds in his heart.

In return, Stefan was a very calming influence for Elena. In previous relationships she had been restless, tossing the boys away as soon as they were swooning. His depth and constanence caught her and held her still, making her feel as cherished as she thought she deserved. In his quiet nature, she found peace and was at last at home.